Blog Articles

Sexless Marriage, and What To Do If It Happens to You

There’s sexless marriage. And then there’s “nearly sexless marriage” — where a couple might only have sex a few times a year. Or as one patient of mine, an insurance executive, described it — “on a quarterly basis.”

Dec 16th, 2018
How Do I Find A Sex Therapist?

Finding a good sex therapist isn’t easy. If you’re suffering from a sexual problem, it’s crucially important that you see someone who understands the difference between a sex therapist and a “regular therapist.”

Dec 16th, 2018
10 Sex Questions from Cosmopolitan

As a sex therapist, someone who answers sex questions for a living, it’s always a pleasure to get asked questions by Cosmo. Here are some recent ones, along with the answers:

Dec 2nd, 2018
Sex Tips for Married Lovers

Sex tips these days tend to be long on technique — but short on feelings.  Maybe that explains why so few couples in my sex therapy practice seem to come in with any idea what good sex is supposed to be all about.

Dec 29th, 2018
Sex At Dawn’s Christopher Ryan on Human Sexual Prehistory

Recently SexualityResource reviewed Sex at Dawn, a new book drawing on a vast amount of cultural and physical anthropological scholarship to suggest that our human ancestors lived in sexually promiscuous groups of hunter-gatherers.

Dec 16th, 2018
Contemporary Sexuality and the Brazilian Wax

“When I was teaching the class of fifteen-year-olds and it was time for the girls to ask their questions of boys, they wanted to know this: ‘Do you prefer girls who have a little hair or a lot of hair?’ I thought they meant hairstyles, as in long hair ve

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex in the Wild

At a recent informal meeting of New York City sex therapists to discuss his new book Sex at Dawn, psychologist Chris Ryan played us a videotape showing a bonobo orgy.

Dec 16th, 2018
Empathy’s Magic

When my daughter was seven, our nanny Irene got married and moved to Florida.

Dec 16th, 2018
Studying Sexuality, One Mouse-Click At a Time

Since Alfred Kinsey and his associates published Sexual Behavior in the Human Male in 1948 and Sexual Behavior in the Human Female in 1953, most sex studies have consisted of questionnaire interviews asking people about their sex lives.

Dec 16th, 2018
Wolf Love in The New York Times

I remember years ago going to see Frank Langella in Dracula on Broadway. The only thing I can recall about the play now is the scene just before the curtain ended Act I:

Dec 16th, 2018
Hello Goodbye

Shakespeare, in his Sonnets, famously imagined three strategies for escaping death: creating art, having children, and loving deeply.

Dec 16th, 2018
Still Further Along the Road Less Traveled

“When my beloved first stands before me naked, all open to my sight, there is a feeling throughout the whole of me; awe. Why? If sex is no more than an instinct, why don’t I simply feel horny or hungry?

Dec 16th, 2018
Fifty Shades of Women’s (Hetero)Sexual Desire

Romance literature, according to the authors of A Billion Wicked Thoughts, is the most popular form of fiction in the world. It’s estimated that the total yearly revenues from the romance novel industry may be greater than that of the online porn industry

Dec 16th, 2018
The Woman in the Mirror

“Being desired is very arousing to women.” — Marta Meana, quoted in A Billion Wicked Thoughts, p. 110.

Dec 16th, 2018
NYC Sex Therapy Diary: “Juego” and Women’s Sexual Desire

In 2009 an article by Daniel Bergner appeared in the New York Times Magazine concerning new research into women’s sexual desire. The article carried a statement that women’s desire is “dominated by the yearnings of self-love, by the wish to be the object

Dec 16th, 2018
Lessons from the World’s Largest Sex Experiment

Mapping the Erotic Mind This year saw the publication of A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a book that among other things discusses its author’s independent analysis of 55 million sex-related Google searches.

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex Therapy NYC: Fifty Shades of Grey

It is 22 year old Anastasia Steele’s first night alone with Seattle billionaire sex-god Christian Grey, in his high-tech mansion in the sky.

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex and Fifty Shades of the City

Sex and the City – That Confusing Opening Scene There’s an image that has haunted me for years. It’s the opening credits of Sex and The City on HBO. Here — watch it with me.

Dec 16th, 2018
Fifty Shades of Sexual Innocence Rewarded

This article is the fourth in a series based more or less on Fifty Shades of Grey. It continues a discussion begun in the previous article Sex and Fifty Shades of the City about the darker side of sexuality in popular culture.

Dec 16th, 2018
Where the Magic Gets Made

After many years of trying, an experienced rock and roll groupie finally managed to sleep with Mick Jagger.

Dec 16th, 2018
Sexual Healing That Won’t Break Your Nose

All things considered, the mental health profession comes off pretty well in this year’s new sex movie Hope Springs. Marriage therapist and author Dr Bernard Feld, played by Steve Carell, is a fairly nice specimen by Hollywood standards.

Dec 16th, 2018
The Year in Clinical Sexuality, 2012

This year Fifty Shades of Grey flashed 1,2 and 3 on the New York Times bestseller list all summer long — only to pretty much disappear from the national consciousness with the arrival of Fall.

Dec 16th, 2018
French women say, “Enough with modernism!

The New York Times reports today that Cinquante Nuances de Grey (that’s French for you-know-what) is now selling briskly in France — despite a hearty and unanimous condemnation by the French literary elite.

Dec 16th, 2018
Can a man make love like a woman?

Several years ago, a merchant in my neighborhood learned that I was both an MD and a sex therapist. The next time I was in his shop, he asked me if I could get him some Viagra

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex in the DSM-5: True Colors

One afternoon 25 years ago, I found myself on a witness stand as a medical expert in a legal hearing concerning a patient of mine.   I was a young doctor at the time, just recently out of training.

Dec 16th, 2018
Sexual Healing, Shame, and the Religious Impulse

In a recent article in PsychologyToday, we began to discuss a new book, An Intimate Life, by Cheryl Cohen Greene — the sex surrogate whose treatment of the profoundly disabled poet Mark O’Brien was the subject of last year’s film The Sessions.

Dec 16th, 2018
How to Talk Sex – and Why

In her new book An Intimate Life, sex surrogate Cheryl Cohen Greene (the one portrayed by Helen Hunt in The Sessions) describes her work with a man who has been unable to get an erection with his wife.

Dec 16th, 2018
The Elements of Desire

Fourth in a series of articles discussing A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a controversial new book by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam that uses the internet to study human sexuality in some new and unusual ways.

Dec 16th, 2018
Cosmopolitan July 2011

No one objected to the book’s account of human sexual diversity. What brought a deluge of criticism was the author’s claim of an underlying order to men’s and women’s sexual tastes.

Dec 16th, 2018
ABCnews.com April 2011

A Billion Sexy Clicks ABC News reporter Lara Salahi interviewed me in April 2011 on the occasion of the launch of a new book, A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a groundbreaking internet study of human sexuality.

Dec 16th, 2018
Daily Makeover March 2013

The best of the articles on scent and desire to come out of my stint with Dolce & Gabbana was Wendy Rodewald’s article in “Daily Makeover” —

Dec 16th, 2018
BuzzFeed April 6, 2015

Dr Snyder Interviewed by BuzzFeed on the Safety of (Ahem) Certain Current Sex Practices

Dec 16th, 2018
Newsweek Special Edition Jan 2015

Anticipating the Fifty Shades of Grey movie launch Feb 14, Newsweek came out with a special edition: “Exploring the Sexual Revolution.”

Dec 16th, 2018
Why Men Can’t Ejaculate During Sex – Cosmo May 2015

For her May 2, 2015 Cosmo article, “8 Myths About Men You Need to Stop Believing,” writer Chiara Atik interviewed me about Delayed Ejaculation (DE), a male sexual dysfunction that’s flown under the radar screen forever.

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex Addiction: How Much is Too Much?

Men’s Fitness’ Justin DeMarco interviewed me along with several other sex experts for his fall 2015 article, “How Much Sex is Too Much Sex?”

Dec 16th, 2018
DeadBedrooms

Why is “DeadBedrooms” trending on Reddit?

Dec 16th, 2018
Sex Therapy and Twilight: Eclipse

Growing up, you come to learn that you’re not the center of the world — that the people who love you also have other concerns.

Dec 16th, 2018
Our Sexual Culture and The New York Times

Camille Paglia’s editorial in The New York Times, “No Sex Please, We’re Middle Class, ” is a fun read, but she throws a lot of things together that I’m not sure really stick.

Dec 16th, 2018