A question of authority One afternoon 25 years ago, I found myself on a witness stand [...]
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Sex in the DSM-5: True Colors
A question of authority One afternoon 25 years ago, I found myself on a witness stand as a medical expert in a legal hearing concerning a patient of mine. I was a young doctor at the time, just recently out of training. I had just been called as a witness by my patient’s [...]
Can a man make love like a woman?
Several years ago, a merchant in my neighborhood learned that I was both an MD and a sex therapist. The next time I was in his shop, he asked me if I could get him some Viagra. “How long have you had erection problems?” I asked. “I don’t,” he answered. “But my wife and I [...]
Sex therapist at the Academy Awards, part 2 — The Courage to be Seen
On the occasion of The Sessions being up for an Academy Award this year (Helen Hunt, for best supporting actress), we’re discussing some of the film’s implications for sex therapy. This is part 2. Something quite ordinary The Sessions tells the story one man’s extraordinary misfortune — paralyzed by polio at age 6 [...]
Sex therapist at the Academy Awards: Helen Hunt in The Sessions
How many of you saw The Sessions? Good – I see some hands. Did it lead to much discussion? Well it didn’t in my house either. And in the popular press the same thing. A few early reviews saying it was very moving, and well done. Then nothing more. A movie about a [...]
French women say, “Enough with modernism! Give us long baths with expensive body wash!”
The New York Times reports today that Cinquante Nuances de Grey (that’s French for you-know-what) is now selling briskly in France — despite a hearty and unanimous condemnation by the French literary elite. According to the article “A Defiant Oui for ‘Fifty Shades” by Times columnist Elaine Sciolino, French critical opinion on the book has pointed [...]
The Year in Clinical Sexuality, 2012
How are they ever going to make this into a movie? This year Fifty Shades of Grey flashed 1,2 and 3 on the New York Times bestseller list all summer long — only to pretty much disappear from the national consciousness with the arrival of Fall. While it lasted, though, FiftyShades spawned a [...]
Slow Sex in Manhattan
“I want to know what became of the changes We waited for love to bring. Were they only the fitful dreams Of some greater awakening? –Jackson Browne, The Pretender The cultivation of sexual mindfulness One rainy Friday afternoon in mid-summer, I traveled uptown to speak with Nicole Daedone, a former [...]
Remembering one of love’s greatest students
A month ago, an article appeared in The New York Times noting the passing, at his home in Switzerland, of Daniel Stern, MD (below) — psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and researcher. Stern’s death failed to make the Times’ front page, but the Science Times featured a memorial piece by Douglas Martin that pretty well captured Stern’s work and [...]
On eros, spirituality, and crying during sex
Most recent in a series of articles and interviews based on the new book Slow Sex by Nicole Daedone. This is article 4 in the series. My fellow sex journalist Tracy Clark-Flory was a guest at one of Nicole Daedone’s weekend retreats for women at Le Meridien in San Francisco last year. [...]
Before the last word is said about FiftyShades
Here’s a question: Does anyone have any idea why Fifty Shades of Grey has sold so many millions of books? I’m asking because in all that I’ve read about this book, I haven’t seen one mention of what it’s really about. And why it’s been such a runaway success. Is it because of [...]
On being deeply nourished. The Nicole Daedone interview, continued.
In previous articles in this series, we’ve been discussing a sexuality practice popularized by author Nicole Daedone – a technique she’s named “Orgasmic Meditation,” though it doesn’t necessarily involve sexual climax in the conventional sex. In her book Slow Sex, she describes how a woman can develop her capacity for sexual attention by [...]
SexualityResource interviews “Slow Sex” author Nicole Daedone — on going to the place of pure feeling
TEDx SF 2011 Alive – Nicole Daedone ©Suzie Katz via Creative Commons “Be who G-d meant you to be, and you will set the world on fire.” — Saint Catherine of Siena Slow Sex author Nicole Daedone says she first learned the technique she now calls “Orgasmic Meditation” (OM) from someone who’d [...]
Nicole Daedone, “Slow Sex,” and the art of eating a tomato.
“The Tao is like a vessel that can never be filled up. It is deep and endless, like the source of all things.” – Lao-Tzu Not far into her book Slow Sex, Nicole Daedone recounts the story of the first time she ever tasted a home-grown heirloom tomato. She was ten [...]
Sexual healing that won’t break your nose
All things considered, the mental health profession comes off pretty well in this year’s new sex movie Hope Springs. Marriage therapist and author Dr Bernard Feld, played by Steve Carell, is a fairly nice specimen by Hollywood standards. He’s likeable, intelligent, confident-but-not-a-shmuck, and commits no flagrant boundary violations. You get the idea. He’s [...]
Sexless in Nebraska: Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones in “Hope Springs”
A strange thing, mystifying In this new movie, Tommy Lee Jones plays an Omaha accountant named Arnold who won’t have sex with his wife — Kay, a sixty-something Everywoman played by a very likeable Meryl Streep. No sex, no physical attention, minimal eye contact, separate bedrooms. The marital estrangement combination platter – with [...]
On staying faithful in Hollywood and elsewhere
July 27 After news of the Kristen Stewart mini-scandal broke this week, I was contacted by IBTimes writer Justine Ashley Costanza about infidelity amongst the famous and not-so-famous. With her permission, I’m reprinting the conversation we had in preparation for her IBTimes article that appeared July 25th. Dr Snyder, you’ve said you’re sympathetic [...]
Where the magic gets made
After many years of trying, an experienced rock and roll groupie finally managed to sleep with Mick Jagger. When her friends asked her how the legendary rocker had been as a sexual partner, she replied, ”He was good — but he was no Mick Jagger.” That sweet coo I couldn’t help [...]
Dr Snyder named to NYC Best Doctor list by New York Magazine
New York City Best Doctors, 2012 I was honored this week to be featured in New York Magazine’s June 11 issue as one of 1,160 best NYC physicians – and as one of only 31 New York City psychiatrists to make the cut. Listing as a New York Magazine Best Doctor has for many years [...]
When should a sex therapist recommend Fifty Shades of Grey to couples?
Eighth in a series on Fifty Shades of Grey Can Fifty Shades save your relationship? I’m hearing the same thing from sex therapists all over the country – If you recommend Fifty Shades of Grey to clients who are stuck in unhappy sexual relationships, some of them will come back reporting better [...]
Fifty Shades for men
OK, guys — By now you’ve probably noticed your wife or girlfriend has become more interested in sex since reading Fifty Shades of Grey. Have you thought of reading it yourself — to find out what all the fuss is about? I’m going to tell you a secret: I read the whole thing. [...]
Why Fifty Shades leaves women wanting . . . more
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. Sixth in a series based on the new book, Fifty Shades of Grey. Can’t Fail Recipe for Erotic Romance 5 cups Twilight 1 cup Marquis de Sade 3 cups raw sex — finely diced Yield: Fifty Shades of Grey Two virgins It’s well known that Fifty Shades [...]
Mass Erotic Choice as a Social Organizer — from Beatlemania to Fifty Shades of Grey
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. Fifth in a series based on the new book, Fifty Shades of Grey. The questions never change Working as a sex therapist, I have more than a passing interest in what the culture happens to be serving up about eros. Part of it is simply curiosity about what [...]
Fifty Shades of Sexual Innocence Rewarded
This article is the fourth in a series based more or less on the new book Fifty Shades of Grey. It continues a discussion begun in the previous article Sex and Fifty Shades of the City about the darker side of sexuality in popular culture. An eighteenth century blockbuster Pamela, published in 1740, was [...]
Sex and Fifty Shades of the City
A strange thing, mystifying There’s an image that has haunted me for years. It’s the opening credits of Sex and The City on HBO. Here — watch it with me. Carrie Bradshaw, played by Sara Jessica Parker, is walking in downtown Manhattan. We see her face first — brash, charming, flirtatious. Then, [...]
Sex therapy NYC — What you still might not know after reading Fifty Shades of Grey
Reader beware After reading Fifty Shades of Grey, you might think you’ve learned something about men who wish to sexually dominate their partners. In particular, you might conclude that being a sexual Dominant probably means one had a very bad childhood, as Christian Grey did. And that like Grey one has problems loving, being [...]
Sex Therapy NYC: Fifty Shades of Grey
One quiet night It is 22 year old Anastasia Steele’s first night alone with Seattle billionaire sex-god Christian Grey, in his high-tech mansion in the sky. Page 85. She is about to experience sexual climax, for the first time in her life. Let’s hear her tell it – “Let go, baby,” he murmurs. [...]
An open letter to just-signed New York Jets quarterback Tim Tebow — about virginity and other important matters
March 22, 2012 Tim — First of all, congratulations on your upcoming move to New York City. It’s a great town, and I’m sure you’ll love it here. As an athlete and a religious man, you will be a role model to many young people here. So I’m writing to you today [...]
The year in clinical sexuality, 2011
As we get ready to leave 2011 behind, I would like as always to express my gratitude to family, friends and colleagues for your support and encouragement over the past year; and to my patients for your trust and confidence. May we all merit much happiness in 2012. Here’s my list of 2011′s [...]
Lessons from the world’s largest sex experiment
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. Mapping the sexual mind This year saw the publication of A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a book that among other things discusses its author’s independent analysis of 55 million sex-related Google searches. Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam, the two computational neuroscientists who wrote A Billion Wicked Thoughts, appear to [...]
SexualityResource at the movies: Twilight Breaking Dawn
A secret code As most careful readers of the Twilight series know, there is a literary work that gets mentioned in each of the later volumes that explains the story. For New Moon, we have Romeo and Juliet. That’s easy. For Breaking Dawn, there’s The Merchant of Venice. A courtroom drama, where a woman [...]
Advice to future sexologists, and other topics
Thanks to sexpert Megan Andelloux from Rhode Island’s Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health for permission to reprint the following interview (slightly modified) from her site www.thecsph.org What do you do in the field of sexuality? I’m a New York City psychiatrist and psychotherapist specializing in sexuality and relationship issues. I also write a [...]
Juego
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. Eleventh in a series of articles loosely based on the new book A Billion Wicked Thoughts by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam Eros, self-love, and the New York Times In 2009 an article by Daniel Bergner appeared in the New York Times Magazine concerning new research into women’s [...]
The woman in the mirror
Tenth in a series of articles on the new book A Billion Wicked Thoughts by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam “Being desired is very arousing to women.” Marta Meana, quoted in A Billion Wicked Thoughts, p. 110. Every little thing she does is magic In a typical romance novel aimed at [...]
Some aspects of women’s (hetero)sexual desire
Ninth in a series of articles loosely based on the new book A Billion Wicked Thoughts by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam. Sex and sensibility Romance literature, according to the authors of A Billion Wicked Thoughts, is the most popular form of fiction in the world. It’s estimated that the total yearly revenues [...]
Same bed, different dreams
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. Eighth in a series of articles loosely based on the new book A Billion Wicked Thoughts by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam. “Same bed, different dreams” – traditional Chinese proverb The big sex discoveries 50 years ago by Masters and Johnson concerned how the physiologies of male and female [...]
The simple, the complex, and the still-forbidden
Detail from “Central Park in Spring” by Brocha Teichman — reproduced by permission of the artist. Seventh in a series of articles loosely based on A Billion Wicked Thoughts, by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam. Things you still can’t say in print about sex. Last May saw the publication of a new and [...]
The Cosmo Interview: Contemporary sexuality and A Billion Wicked Thoughts
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7, via Creative Commons. I was recently interviewed by Karen Robertson for Cosmopolitan South Africa on the subject of the new book A Billion Wicked Thoughts, which has been extensively reviewed on these pages. Ms. Robertson’s article “Is Kinky the New Normal?” appeared in Cosmopolitan South Africa in July 2011. Thanks [...]
Still further along the road less traveled
“When my beloved first stands before me naked, all open to my sight, there is a feeling throughout the whole of me; awe. Why? If sex is no more than an instinct, why don’t I simply feel horny or hungry? Such simple hunger would be quite sufficient to insure the propagation of the species. Why [...]
What’s so new about the new non-monogamy?
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7 via Creative Commons “Monogamy Lite” For those of you who missed “Open Marriage,” the ethical non-monogamy movement of the 70’s: Ethical non-monogamy is back. Not that it ever actually disappeared. But it seems to be making news again. Last year the New York Times bestselling book Sex at Dawn (extensively reviewed [...]
Hello goodbye
Shakespeare, in his Sonnets, famously imagined three strategies for escaping death: creating art, having children, and loving deeply. It’s a tribute to sex that it can sometimes be involved in at least two out of those three. I considered this today as I took my son to board the bus for sleepaway camp. [...]
———- Sex and the High Octane Woman ———- A conversation with Dr Sherrie Bourg Carter
Thanks to Sherrie Bourg Carter, Psy.D. — author of the new book, High Octane Women: How Superachievers Can Avoid Burnout (2011, Prometheus Books). – for permission to reprint this interview from her blog, High Octane Women, on PsychologyToday. The interview is part of a longer article, Sex and the High Octane Woman. ___ Dr. Carter: Most high-achieving [...]
The SexualityResource interview: What to do when size obsession gets out of hand
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7 Tori Rodriguez, a writer for MensHealth.com, recently interviewed me for a short article, The Obsession with Size, prompted by a recent article in the British Journal of Urology reporting that most men electing penis enlargement surgery are in fact normally endowed. Thanks to Ms Rodriguez and to the editors of MensHealth.com [...]
The search for sexual sanity continues
Now that Representative Anthony Weiner is reported to be seeking professional help, one question seems to be on many people’s minds: Help for what? That’s not clear. Sending suggestive photos of oneself to young women is clearly personally and professionally hazardous. But does it reflect a disorder requiring treatment? Common sense would say that [...]
Eros and technology: Jonathan Franzen in The New York Times
Blackberry love “A couple of weeks ago, I replaced my three-year-old BlackBerry Pearl with a much more powerful BlackBerry Bold. Needless to say, I was impressed with how far the technology had advanced in three years. Even when I didn’t have anybody to call or text or e-mail, I wanted to keep fondling my [...]
Wolf love in The New York Times
Vampires in love I remember years ago going to see Frank Langella in Dracula on Broadway. The only thing I can recall about the play now is the scene just before the curtain that ended Act I: As I remember, there were just two people still on stage – the Count and his female [...]
What turns men on, really?
(Fifth in a series of articles discussing A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a controversial new book by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam that uses the internet to study human sexuality in some new and unusual ways. Photocredit: Pedrosimoes7 ) As simple as it gets “Wolfgang likes to look at images of female derrieres. [...]
The elements of desire
(Fourth in a series of articles discussing A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a controversial new book by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam that uses the internet to study human sexuality in some new and unusual ways. Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7) There’s an app for that Much like your average personal computer, the human brain [...]
Sexual science meets “A Billion Wicked Thoughts”
(Third in a series of articles discussing A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a controversial new book by Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam that uses the internet to study human sexuality in some new and unusual ways. Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7) A Billion Wicked Thoughts describes a novel collection of data representing the sexual internet searches of [...]
Studying sexuality, one mouse-click at a time.
(Second in a series of articles discussing A Billion Wicked Thoughts, a controversial new book by neuroscientists Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam that uses the internet to study human sexuality in some new and unusual ways. Photo credit: pedrosimoes7) Dr Kinsey meets Masters+Johnson Since Alfred Kinsey and his associates published Sexual Behavior in [...]
The strange new science behind “A Billion Wicked Thoughts”
A shocking discovery It’s not so unusual these days for a woman to discover pornographic pictures on her husband’s computer. But the images that one wife found recently were especially shocking. Her first thought when she found them was, “This is the end of our marriage.” Her next thought was, “This is the end [...]
The Perfect Vagina — Why is genital cosmetic surgery suddenly so popular?
Detail from “Modesty,” by sculptor Jamie McCartney. Reproduced by permission of the artist. www.jamiemccartney.com Why are more women choosing to have genital cosmetic surgery? After viewing a recent Channel 4 film “The Perfect Vagina,” by British Documentary Director and Producer Heather Leach, I understood why. It’s the explosion in the last decade of print and [...]
Another look at sex and Propecia
Just because you stop the medication, doesn’t mean the problem will resolve. It’s been known for a long time that finasteride, commonly taken by men as Propecia to prevent hair loss, can occasionally cause loss of erections and loss of sexual desire. Last time in “Manhattan Sex Therapist’s Diary” we discussed how two recent medical [...]
Diary of a Manhattan Sex Therapist: Propecia
Who knew? It’s a scene that replays in my office several times a year. A couple comes to see me because the man has developed trouble with his erections. Often accompanied by loss of sexual desire. I always make sure to review such a man’s medical status in the first visit. Does he smoke [...]
The 36th Annual Meeting of the Society for Sex Therapy and Rearch (SSTAR): Presentation of the 2011 SSTAR Consumer Book Award to Sex at Dawn
I just returned from the annual spring meeting of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research (SSTAR). The Society gathers leading sex clinicians and researchers from all over the country and the world, and features the most recent developments in sexual science and practice. As a member of SSTAR’s Consumer Book Award committee, I had the privilege [...]
Diary of a Manhattan Sex Therapist — The other side of Saturday night
Want to test your knowledge of male sexual psychology? Take this quiz: QUIZ: It’s Saturday night. Paul, 25 years old, is on a date with a new woman whom he likes very much and finds very sexy. Unfortunately, later that night when they undress together, he suddenly has no erection. She is very understanding [...]
Eros, thanatos, and Sunday afternoon
(Part 3 of a series prompted by Vanessa Woods’ Bonobo Handshake.) Across the river and into the trees One day last summer my son came home from a birthday party covered with bruises, bleeding, and looking very proud of himself. Happily examining his wounds in the bathtub, he explained that he’d been playing paintball, which [...]
Empathy’s magic
(Part 2 of a series prompted by Vanessa Wood’s Bonobo Handshake. Part 3 will follow shortly, after which we’ll return to our main subject) Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7 Empathy and its impediments When my daughter was seven, our nanny Irene got married and moved to Florida. This was a big loss for my daughter, who for [...]
Sex in the wild
A new twist on the apple At a recent informal meeting of New York City sex therapists to discuss his new book Sex at Dawn, psychologist Chris Ryan played us a videotape showing a bonobo orgy. The tape was several minutes long. It showed a small crew of cute little apes cavorting in the grass in all [...]
Edith Wharton and the Nine Rooms of Happiness
Sex and Eros The average adult heterosexual man, in the average relationship with an adult woman, doesn’t ask for so much - and doesn’t have so much to give. He’d like a good meal, a little appreciation for how well he replaced the lightbulb in the bathroom yesterday. Then he wants to be left alone [...]
The year in clinical sexuality, 2010
As we get ready to close the books on 2010, I would like to express my gratitude to family, friends, and colleagues for your support and encouragement over the past year. And to all my patients for your trust and confidence. May we all merit much happiness in 2011. In ending the year, [...]
The Nine Rooms of Happiness: What does a woman want?
What does a woman want? Freud, famously, claimed not to know. In a letter to his student Marie Bonaparte, he wrote, ‘The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is ”What does a woman want?”‘ I think [...]
Sexual arousal for its own sake
Simmering: A two minute technique for nourishing the erotic bond between partners. Useful for modern couples for whom the idea of leisure time is a quaint memory, but who’d like to stay in touch. A modern dilemma Recently I had lunch with my colleague Eric Amaranth, and the conversation turned to the subject of polyamory — [...]
Sexuality, simmering, and the B train back from the beach
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7 A train in motion On the B train, one hot summer Sunday afternoon. I’m bringing my children and a few of their friends back to Manhattan, after a long day at the beach in Brooklyn. There’s a young couple standing near the exit door, sharing an ipod headset. Each with an earpiece [...]
Contemporary sexuality and the Brazilian wax
Photo credit: Pedrosimoes7 Does she, or doesn’t she? “When I was teaching the class of fifteen-year-olds and it was time for the girls to ask their questions of boys, they wanted to know this: ‘Do you prefer girls who have a little hair or a lot of hair?’ I thought they meant hairstyles, as in [...]
The end of “Pink Viagra”:What have we learned?
(reprinted from Dr Snyder’s www.PsychologyToday.com/blog/SexualityToday) Another one bites the dust. As many of you know, this month the pharmaceutical firm Boehringer Ingelheim pulled the plug on flibanserin, the reputed (and as many have remarked, misnamed) “Pink Viagra,” which had been developed as a treatment for something called Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD) in women. Many in [...]
The SexualityResource Interview: Sex At Dawn’s Christopher Ryan on human sexual prehistory
(Reprinted from Dr Snyder’s PsychologyToday blog, “SexualityToday”) Recently, Sexuality Resource reviewed Sex at Dawn, a new book drawing on a vast amount of cultural and physical anthropological scholarship to suggest that our human ancestors lived in sexually promiscuous groups of hunter-gatherers. And that the development 10,000 years ago of agriculture, an ownership society, and sexual [...]
Will “Sex at Dawn” influence sex therapy?
Recently, Sexuality Resource reviewed Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha’s Sex at Dawn – a new book drawing on a vast amount of cultural and physical anthropological scholarship to argue that for our hunter-gatherer ancestors, sexual promiscuity may have been an established way of life. And that the development 10,000 years ago of agriculture, an ownership society, and sexual [...]
Sexuality Resource reviews “Sex at Dawn,” by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha
We moderns tend to think of sexuality as the province of more-or-less monogamous couples, bound together by bonds of love, romantic possessiveness, and jealousy. But according to Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha, at the “dawn” of mankind — the vast era dating from 200,000 to 10,000 years ago – things were quite different. In their [...]
The Sexuality Resource Interview: Dr Laura Muggli on ADHD in Women
After posting two articles on ADHD and Marriage in response to a recent NYTimes article, I received several responses asking specifically about women with ADHD. I decided to consult my favorite Women’s ADHD guru, Dr Laura Muggli. Laura, we hear a lot lately about ADHD and relationships, but it’s mostly about men with ADHD. What [...]
Infidelity at the office, and how to avoid it.
The following is reprinted from Dr Snyder’s article “Are you ready for the truth?” — with permission from the original Italian publisher – WorkStyle Magazine Vol 4 (p. 32-33), July 2010. Because they’re there. The most common reason romantic love happens with coworkers is simply because they’re there. We spend a lot of time at [...]
ADHD, Marriage, and The N. Y. Times – Part 2 Alvin? Alvin??! ALVIIIN!!!!
The word “Deficit” in “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder” is seriously misleading. As any parent of a kid with ADHD will tell you, such children often have an astounding capacity for paying attention to something that happens to be immediately exciting, such as a video game. The problem is that they have trouble paying attention to [...]
ADHD, Marriage, and the New York Times
At long last, ADHD and its marital consequences have reached The New York Times. Tara Parker-Pope’s July 20 column concerns the long-overdue recognition of the pivotal role that an individual’s having ADHD can have on a romantic partnership. The high incidence of marital distress and even divorce in such relationships. What’s remarkable is that the [...]
Our sexual culture and The New York Times
The latest public figure to make journalistic hay from the flibanserin controversy is Camille Paglia, whose editorial in The New York Times, ”No Sex Please, We’re Middle Class, “ seems to be getting some play on my twitter feed. It’s a fun read, but she throws a lot of things together that I’m not sure really [...]
Sex Therapy and Twilight: Eclipse
Growing up, we each come to learn that we’re not the center of the world — that the people who love us also have other concerns. But eros is primitive, and the erotic mind is a poor student. It remains fixated on an image of pure, absolute attention from an adoring other. And the power [...]
Simplicity, complexity, and the hunt for Pink Viagra
Will there ever be a Viagra for women? If so, would the FDA ever approve it? How many women would actually want to try it? This month, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration is expected to consider drug manufacturer Boehringer-Ingelheim’s new drug flibanserin — a medication reported to somewhat improve female sexual desire. [...]
Men and their computers, alone together.
In the traditional Jewish world, a man and woman not married to each other are forbidden to be alone together. The Jewish laws covering this issue, collectively known as the laws of Yichud, are intended to counter the inherently stronger natural laws of sexual attraction. As strange as such laws might seem to [...]
The latest news about premature ejaculation
2010 — On Friday April 16, the latest news about premature ejaculation came in from Europe: PRNewswire’s “Men slow to talk about fast sex”. It was a release citing some data from a new survey on PE, which confirmed something that we sex therapists have always known: Premature ejaculation is a [...]
Some open secrets about sexual arousal
The secrets of sexual arousal are hidden in plain sight. You just have to know what you’re looking for. Physical sexual arousal – the sexually aroused body – has been endlessly studied, most famously by Masters and Johnson in the 1960′s. And less rigorously but no less intensely by every sexual couple since the dawn of [...]
Twilight, and the art of foreplay
Foreplay. Women traditionally complain they don’t get enough of it. Often this gets interpreted as being due to a woman’s needing more physical stimulation to get fully aroused. OK, maybe sometimes that’s the issue. But I don’t see it as the essential thing. The physical aspects of sex rarely are. The essential thing [...]
Dining and Differentiation
What’s the secret to making your love a lasting one? What’s the secret to keeping sexual passion alive? There’s no one best answer, and every couple is different. But many sex therapists, myself included, talk about something called “differentiation” as a key factor. Differentation means being able to take care of yourself, as a separate [...]
